Why are the kids being raped

        Delhi, the capital of  India , is supposed to be a safe place for all. But it is not so.It is perhaps the most unsafe place Hardly a day passes without a rape. There are average 6 rapes a day in Delhi.And the victims are from an infant to an 80 years old woman or so. Recently there was a spate of rapes of little girls.One day a 6 years old girl was raped.Next day there were 2 rapes--one of two and a half year girl and the other of 4 or 5 years old girl.There are rapes and gang rapes and the police is just watching mootly.Perhaps everybody's responsibility is nobody's responsibility.From time to time our honourable ministers give their precious views .The other day a minister opined that mobile in the hands of girls is responsible for rapes. One minister blamed the jeans for all this.They give their views off and on sans any logic.How are the kids responsible? Will they please answer?
        Why do kids become victims?why are our children not safe? When will all this stop? A group was discussing these things . Every body , without an exception , agreed that these were all sick minds .Rapes were perhaps always there .But now media brings such incidents to the fore. Moreover just as the population has increased, so have the criminals.Moreover now more and more people are coming forward and lodging complaints. That is a good trend.As usual the first blame was for the police departmentAnd is true. Their slow speed of tracking the cases, their tendency of making the cases so weak that they may fail on the first hearing.There is one more trend. They are not ready to write the FIR.After the police come the courts. They take years to decide the cases No doubt, the courts are over-burdened, but there are many judges who just believe in giving dates. (Taareekh pe taareekh).The justice should be quick. Punishment should be exemplary.
          Who will set the house in order? When a child or a daughter of a politician or a beurocat is a victim, then they will wake up.When the public decides tobe on the streets over such issues as  in Nirbhayas case in Delhi, then the politicians  will wake up. Today the girls are the victims, sooner or later, the boys are also going to be the victims.Then perhaps that percentage of the public who have only sons will rise and jump in this struggle against rapists and molesters,

एक अजन्मी बेटी का रुदन

माँ

मैं तेरी अजन्मी बेटी

जो कोख में ही मार दी गईं

क्योकि वह इक लड़की थी

जिस के लिए तू बहुत रोई,बहुत तड़फ़ी

आज तेरे साथ 

तेरा दुःख बाँटने आई हूँ

माँ

पहिले मैं भी बहुत रोई थी

तड़फ़ी थी,कुरलाई थी 

कि मुझे जन्म से पहिले ही मार दिया गया 

मेरा अस्तित्व बनने से पहिले ही उखाड़ दिया गया

मैंने तो माँ बाप के साथ दुःख बाँटने थे

भाई की कलाई पर राखी सजानी थी

पर ऐसा हो न सका

माँ बाप के दुःख बटने से रह गए

भाई की कलाई सूनी ही रह गईं

पर फिर ,सोचते सोचते

मैंने देखा अपना बीता कल

एक बेटी, एक लड़की का बीता कल

जन्मों जन्मों से

यही होता आया है

कभी दाई ने नाक बंद करके

कभी राख की चुटकी के साथ

कभी गला दबा कर और कभी अफीम देकर

मुझे मारा गया

ये तो कृपा है विज्ञान की

कि अब मैं

नौ माह की जगह 

चार माह ही माँ की कोख में रहती हूँ

माँ

जरा सोचो

अगर तुम मुझे जन्म दे भी देती

तो क्या होता

इस समाज में

इस पीड़ित समाज में

जीना आसां नहीं

जन्म से लेकर बुढ़ापे तक

हर कदम, हर पल

औरत होने का एहसास कराया जाता है

जैसे औरत होना कोई पाप हो

कभी रेप

कभी इज्जत पर हमला

कभी बॉस की गन्दी नज़रें

कभी सड़क छाप रोमियो और मजनुओं की  आवाज़ें

ये सब ही तो औरत को

सौगात में दिया जाता है

वोह औरत

जो किसी की मां है,बहिन है

उसे वासना का शिकार बनाया जाता है

इस समाज में

मैं किसी तरह बचती बचाती

बड़ी होती और फिर मेरा विवाह होता

ज़रा सोचो विवाह

 और फिर क्या होता

सास दहेज़ के ताहने देती

और पती

माँ का पल्लू पकड़ कर

एक तरफ खड़ा देखता रहता

हो सकता है मुझे जला दिया जाता

दहेज़ की बलि चढ़ा दिया जाता

नहीं तो 

लड़के की चाह में

मैं भी शायद वही करने को मजबूर की जाती 

जो तुमने किया

नहीं माँ नहीं

मेरे न होने का गम न कर

हिम्मत कर

अगर मैं होती तो 

मैं तेरी कमजोरी होती

अब मेरे लिए

मेरे जैसी अनगिनत अजन्मी बच्चीयों के लिए

बहादुर बन जा

समाज में जागृति पैदा कर

आज के बाद कोई माँ बेटी को 

कोख में मारने को मजबूर न हो

कोई रेपिस्ट खुला न घूमे

कोई बेटी दहेज़ की बलि न चढे

और कोई माँ

अजन्मी बेटी को याद करके

न रोये, न आंसू बहाये।

जब सूरज शाम को ढलता है ,कोठी पर सब कुछ चलता है

हमारे देश में आज रिश्वत का बहुत जोर है ।भ्रष्टाचार चरम सीमा पर है।जहाँ कहीं काम के लिए जाओ तो मुँह खुला हुआ मिलता है। रिश्वत तो जैसे हक़ बन चुका है। एक तरफ बड़े बड़े सकैम हो रहे हैं दूसरी तरफ गरीब जनता महंगाई में पिस रही है।आज से पचपन साल पहिले इतना बुरा हाल नहीं था छोटे मोटे गिफ्ट से ही काम निकल आता था। छोटी मोटी सिफारिश भी चल जाती थी।तब मैंने एक कविता लिखी थी जो मैंने 2013 में इसी ब्लॉग पर अंग्रेजी स्क्रिप्ट में अंग्रेजी अनुवाद के साथ छापी थी। आज वही कविता में हिंदी में छाप रही हूँ।कविता का शीर्षक है

जब सूरज शाम को ढलता है कोठी पर सब कुछ चलता है

दफ्तर को पहुंचे लेट हम
आगे ना था अफसर भी कम
हमारी चेकिंग हो गयी
हमसे क्या गलती हो गयी
अफसर हुआ खिलाफ क्यों
साथी से पूछा हमने यूँ
तुम ना आये सारा दिन
और वो भी अर्जी के बिन
मैं आया आधा घंटा लेट
क्यों बनने लगा मेरा आमलेट
कहने लगा सुन मेरे यार
होकर ज़रा तू होश्यार
साहिब की कोठी मैं गया
हाथ में डिब्बा लिया
मुन्ने को जा पकड़ा दिया
और कहा
कल आऊंगा कुछ देर से
जाना कहीं सवेर से
साहिब ने मौन धर लिया
हमने मुह माँगा वर लिया
तुमने चचा कुछ भी किया
आखिर मुन्ने को क्या दिया
वो ना रिश्वत लेते हैं
लेते केवल उपहार हैं
जो उनके मुन्ने को दीजिये
करते उसे स्वीकार हैं
जब सूरज शाम को ढलता है
कोठी पर सब कुछ चलता है

हमने भी राज़ पा लिया
दिल अपने को समझा लिया
रोज़ कोठी जाने लगे
साथियों का दिल हिलाने लगे
सोचा
मुन्ना तो अभी बच्चा है
मैडम का दिल भी अच्छा है
साड़ी का डिब्बा लिया
मैडम को जा पकड़ा दिया
मैडम ने डिब्बा धर लिया
हमने मुह माँगा वर लिया
क्लर्क से स्टेनो बन गए
झक मरते सब रह गए
मेरा दोस्त कहने लगा
सेनिओरिटी लिस्ट का क्या हुआ
हमने उसे समझा दिया
उसका कहा दोहरा दिया
जब सूरज शाम को ढलता है
कोठी पर सब कुछ चलता है

Where are the girls safe?

                                             Where are the girls safe?

          A very valid question in our culturally rich India.We hear of rape at various public places. We hear of gang rapes but very rarely of a rape I am talking of now. And all will agree that girls are safe nowhere. The case I am going to narrate stunned me.Whenever I hear of a rape, my soul cries that they be  given an exemplary punishment, their very organ be ripped off and that also at a public place.We Indians are so proud of our rich heritage.  We claim that daughter of a village is the daughter of the whole village. We worship Devies and kill our daughters in the womb. Daughter-in-laws are burnt, wives are ill-treated and what not.No daughter, sister, woman, mother even grandmother is safe and can become a victim of rape.
          A woman relative of a seventeen years  old girl  lodged a complaint at  an all woman police station that the girl was being violated in her own house. The girl's statement was recorded. She was two years old when her mother died.She was brought up by her grandparents. Three years back her grandfather raped her.Then her brother raped her and then his friend whom his brother brought for money.Her neighbors did not spare her.Her father also raped her.She had met her father after tenth class. She went to the police as she was having problem with him.The policemen wanted sexual favour in lieu of helping her. Then they sent her  to a hotel to oblige their officers.These gangrapes continued  till her relative came to her rescue.She gave this statement before a magistrate and was sent to some govt home.But tbe complaint was to be written by the police.They made a weak case as the girl had named police officers as well  Only father and brother were arrested.Even the cctv footage was tempered Now there is a PIL for handing over the case to CBI.
            Now tell me where are girls safe?

GOAT-MY FANTASY

           Gandhi ji always had a goat with him.I can't remember when this idea became my obsession that we should develop a goat culture. We love to have a dog.Some like to keep cats. Some go for rabbits. Some love parrots, pigeons and hens  Why don't we start having a goat? Of course there will be some problems but the solutions are always possible.I kept on thinking and thinking about various advantages of rearing a goat and would have loved to have a goat. And thus the animal of my dreams became my fantasy.
           If we had a goat culture, we would have got accustomed to the sounds a goat made--some of joy, some for food and some expressing pain.While keeping a goat-especially in a flat --the space would have been a problem.For this we could tie it in a balcony  or could allot  it a bathroom if we had two.Second problem would have been its poo or potty. As is well known, necessity is the mother of invention. So the market would have been flooded with diapers.Goat clinics would have sprung up here and there. Goat care houses would also have been taking care of your goats in case of your going for vacations . Goat maternity homes would also have sprung up. Similarly other problems would also have got solutions.
            So here comes my fantasy. We are having a goat culture. We can see people taking their goats for a stroll. People are seen discussing about their goats.Sometimes while roaming in front of the houses poor goat attends to its nature's call  or grabs some precious plants and a scene is created on the road. Now your goat takes care of all your organic waste.And in return you get milk as well.The milk vendors go on strike and people envy you as you are tensionfree in this position. Your children are getting healthy milk. Dengu has spread all around and your goat has beome the envy of many but your proud. Its milk is available in the market for 2 or 3 thousand bucks a kilo  but you can now oblige  many.Your goat has gone for delivery but don't worry for the expenditure ,you will get a deal from tbe maternity home for goats.So we see that tbis goat culture has more pluses than minuses.If only it could happen!

From the kitchen ( cake)

WHEAT SHAKKAR (JAGGERY POWDER ) CAKE

       Majority of us love cake . But having refined flour gives a feeling of guilt  So I thought of trying to make a wheat cake with shakkar and it was successful. Here is the recipe
Ingredients--
Wheat flour-1cup
Shakkar(jaggery powder)-3/4cup
Butter-1/2cup
Oil/ghee-1tbsp
Baking powder-3/4tsp
Baking soda-1/4tsp
Salt-a tip of spoon
Eggs-2
Milk-as much required
Vanilla essence-1tsp
Method--
Sieve the flour, baking powder, baking soda and salt  three times  and put aside.take a eight inch cake pan, butter it and dust with flour . Beat butter, ghee, shakkar, eggs and vanilla essence in a bowl.Mix the dry ingredients .Put milk if the batter is too thick. Pour the batter in thecake pan. Bake in the pre-heated oven for thirty minutes at 180 degree.Check with a knife or a needle and let it cool for ten minutes and take out from the pan and put on a wire rack to cool before cutting.

The Dreams That Still Haunt Me

  Dreams are an integral part of life. We see dreams often in sleep and sometimes while awake. Many a times the dreams seen at night are just washed out  when we get up in the morning. But it is not always so. Some times when we get up, we just feel depressed but can not remember why . Sometimes the dreams go on haunting for days and months and even years . Sometimes the dreams come true as well.often when I am alone or am in an absent minded state, I am transported to that land of dreams which came to me and then kept on haunting me for days to come.

  The first dream that I am recollecting is of the time when I was just eleven years old. I am still not sure whether it was a dream or a real incident. The name of the town was Budaun in UP.We lived on the outskirts of the town.It was a floor mill and we lived in the one room house attached with it.At midnight I got awake. I was lying awake with my eyes wide open. There was a big tamarind tree visible from the bed . Two ghosts were sitting over it.They had hat type caps--two plates that were always lying in the open for the hens to take water --on their heads.They were chatting. Then I went into sleep.

   I was sleeping .At midnight as I opened my eyes, lying on the cot I saw a ghost nearby.She was folding the clothes lying on the corner  of the bed.Next day I saw  a lady in black clothes was getting out of the room from a window (that was never there) . It was pitch dark.I was badly terrified.I still can't say if it was a dream or I was awake.After a few days my grandfather expired..From next night onwards I began to pray to God before sleeping that let me not awake at midnight.And God was kind enough

   I was about sixteen years old when I saw in my dream that my father was lying onthe floor injured. Nobody was there.I asked him as to who had injured him.l promised that I would take revenge from him. His reply was in one word-- poverty.After about four years he expired. I don't know if I have fulfilled the promise .

The year was 1984 .I had a dream that I had gone to the golden temple.I saw shoes inside the golden temple outside Darshani Deori . One reaches the main Darbar Sahib/Golden Temple crossing this place. This thing can't be imagined even that one goes there with shoes on.I saw the same dream twice. Then operation bluestar happened.Shoes were taken every where.All believers were badly hurt.This premonition sent shivers all through my  body. I never had this dream again.

   It was the year 2000 or so.I saw a UFO.Hands came out of it .They caught hold of my 24 years old daughter  and snatched her.I tried to get hold of her .The object was flying away along with my daughter. At last her feet also slipped off my hands. And after 5 years my daughter migrated to Canada two years after her marriage.

  The year was of Mumbai bomb blast.One day I got up  and was going about with routine chores.My housband was scanning the news paper.His shocked voice came --there  is an attack on Mumbai------- I could hear no more ? I was stunned. I had a dream in the morning--I was in Mumbai standing on the top flour looking downwards .I saw an injured soldier being taken on the stature.And we were talking that something had happened at the crossing.so another dream came true.

   Now I am afraid of dreams

Girls and Matrimonial Problems

    There are rising cases of matrimonial disputes and divorce in punjab .  Punjab Women Commission is going to start a move to help the girls to save their marriage from divorce. The girls will be given tips on keeping their marriage intact. The plan is to start pre-marital counselling sessions in colleges to create awareness about matrimonial problems  and preventive measures.They will be made aware of the fact how to tackle with day to day problems and not to be ready for the extreme  step. A successful marriage needs time and space . They will also be given awareness of their rights and in case of problems  legal remedies available.
   No doubt the step should be applauded. The lesson, the patience that the girls learnt while living in a joint family are missing in today's india.The girls of today are aware of their rights . They want freedom.They cannot tolerate injustice.But certain other points should also be kept in mind to solve this problem.All the girls are not lucky enough to go to college.  So such a counselling should be given at the school level when the girls are to complete their secondary education.In this way majority of the girls will be covered. Secondly why only girls. Boys also need counselling. They ought to know their duties and responsibilities.  They ought to know that  a girl who comes to a new house  needs space. Mothers and mother in laws  both should  understand that they should both give their children right advice and help them settle in life without
 bitterness.

Government Schools and Teachers

      In the government schools oh Punjab , the teachers are  appointed for teaching. At least this is what the appointment letter says. But alas! this is not so.Our Government  expects  the teachers to do so many different works along with teaching little realizing how much the studies  suffer when teachers are
 involved in other works. Whenever the government needs some survey  to be done, the teachers are allotted the work. There are elections ,the teachers are ordered  to do election duty.This is just a tip of the iceburg. Off and on such orders come without giving any consideration to the fact how much the studies suffer?A few days back there was a news that the teachers  will check in the villages that people do not go to the fields to defecate, if they dont have a toilet in their house, then ask them to put soil over their droppings and if they do not do so, himself or herself cover it with soil. Perhaps better sense prevailed and the orders were withdrawn. Today there was a news that the teachers have been ordered to keep record of the children who are unwell and who go to the hospitals or  doctors for  treatment .Quite surprising .why  should the teachers do it ?Who will teach the children ? Why dont the politicion understand that teaching is a full time job and there are so nany other works related with teaching. If they want efficient teaching they should stop all such duties  . They should rather provide assistant teachers to lessen the burden of the teachers because the student teacher ratio in our schools is not ok The strength of the children is quite much and the Teachers alone cannot teach, check  the notebooks, and also work for the alround development of children. Government should try to be a model for the whole of India and send such a message to the regarding efficient teaching.There are  so many other departments at the disposal of the government who can do other jobs .We hope that a better sense will prevail and teachers will be given full time to concentrate on teaching.

From the kitchen

Chat masala

Ingredients
1cup slightly roasted coriander seeds
1cup roasted red chillies
1cup roasted cumin seeds
1/2cup amchoor
3tbsp Kali mirch
3tbsp black salt
1cup salt
1/2 cup ajwain
2tsp garam masala
1/2cup dried mint leaves
1tbsp saunf
1tsp Hing
2tsp ginger powder

Method
Grind all the things . Sieve and fill In a zar

Children

Your children are not your chilren,
They are the sons and daughters of life's longing  for itself
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you,
You may give them your love but not your thoughts.
                                                                   
                                                                       Khalil Gibran


Children are not your property, they are your asset.
                                                                         
                                                                          Unknown

Bye 2014 and women

       BYE 2014 AND WELCOME 2015.There is this din and noise all around.Why not leave it behind and let us ponder over the burning topic of the yester year -the position of women in independent India.Let us see how much has the sacrifice of Damini awakened India?How much has the public reaction to assault on Damini awakened  the government?And you will just scratch your head.

       Nothing much has changed.There is only one silver lining that more and more people have started to come forward to report the matter.Even today little girls are being raped,young women are being raped, middle aged women are being targetted and so are the senior women  even- the most respected dadies and nanies. And who are the criminals? The rapist can be the person living next door,your close relative,someone in your contacts, a cop, a driver, your teacher, your boss and any one and every one.WHERE are women safe?

      There are fast track courts.They are working but what when the victim is threatenedAnd she is terrified and refuses to recognize the culprit?What when the cops make a weak case and the case cannot stand the scrutiny of the court?Good intentions of a few persons cannot overpower the bad mentality of the majority.Then what to do?

      Some of those who matter in the corridors of power give such statements that  put the girls/women inthe dock.When there are protests , they say sorry and withdraw the statements.But by that time the damage had been done.Some object to the wearing of jeans or using the mobiles -something rubbish in this age, but none wants the boys to be reprimanded, to be taught to respect the women. And this is all because we have a male dominated society and majority who  dominate and make their voice heard are still in the pre-independense era.Those whose voice is heard through media often matter and they themselves are often so so backward- minded that one feels ashamed

      Many a times I feel that all tbis publicity about the status of women in India is more of just a publicity-some for getting votes and some for showing to the world that we are advanced and cultured. One person gives a biased statement ,NGOs condemn,media cries, opposition condemns and then tne din dies. No action is visible. Even tha opposition is just taking milage, wants to harvest some gains from the folly of the speaker.

      Girls! Get up. Women! Get up. Get up to save your mothers, sisters and daughters. Ours is a country where folk lores of Jhani ki Rani Laxmi Bai are still read in the schools. We are in need of Laxmi Bais.Whenever there is a statement contrary to our freedom or our respect,get up and make such a hue and cry that all shouldrealize the truth in you. If a girl is raped, give her all your support.The girl who is raped is not at fault.It is the sickness of our minds that the victim faces the humiliation. If a boy is beaten or even assaulted, nobody blames the boy, then why the girl?

       One thing is very important. Take care of yourself.If you are travelling late,be careful not to travel in a lonely bus or taxi. Safety saves.Dress up according to the area where you live. Learn martial arts to save yourself and the others like you.Be bold . Keep chilli spray and other things in your bag. Learn to help each others -a quality which our society is fast losing. Be alert about your surroundings. Love thyself. Love thy neighbour . One thing more -if you find a girl taking advantage of being a girl, expose her as well and teach her a lesson. 

Murg Pickle

Murg pickle

Boneless chicken breast-2
Oil-3tbsp
Mustard powder-1tbsp
Ginger -2tbsp
Garlic-2tbsp
Saunf and fenugreek powder roasted- 1tbsp each
Haldi-1tsp
Red chillies-1tsp
Garammasala-1tsp
Kalaunji- 1/2tsp

Method-
Heat oil. Put ginger garlic and saute for 2 minutes. Put chicken chunks and stir fry for five minutes.put spices and cook for 2 minutes.put vinegar and give a boil.cool and fill in a zar

2015

       1st Jan 2015.Sounds of Happy New Year all around.At least there is a day  when all are wishing happiness for all or atleast pretending so.Let us pray that in the year that has seen the light today,we should always pray for the happiness of others, happiness of all .
      But is it sufficient that we should pray?We should just pray and God will come down on earth to accomplish the work.No , my dear no.If you are sincere to all,try to do something good for others.Do not say or think that you can not do anything.Do take a step, it may be a baby step even.It will do.Do not think you are helpless .Count your blessings and you will find  that you are at an advantage,there are many and many who are less blessed than you
        I think all will agree with what I say.We all want that we should take a step towards becoming a better human being.We can not change others but we can try to change ourselves.So take a few minutes from your work schedule daily and think what good or bad you did.Be careful and try to check even your thought process.If we succeed in doing this much,we have taken our first baby step.